The Way I Loved You
by MarryTheNight25
Summary: Samantha Ryan has finally decided to give dating another try a year after a tough break-up with Phil Brooks. What happens when Samantha comes face to face with her one time beau? Inspired by Taylor Swift's "The Way I Loved You" Read & Review :
1. Chapter 1

**I own nothing except OCs...Please Read & Review :)**

It was Thursday night and Samantha Ryan was getting ready for her big date. She hadn't gone out on a date for almost a year, since she ended her relationship with Phil Brooks, better known as CM Punk. Fame had gone to his head and he had forgotten what was important in life, the number one thing he had forgotten about was Sam. It had taken a while to get over it, but with the help of her best friends Corey and Mattie she was moving on. Tonight she was going out not only on her first date since the break-up, but on a blind date. Corey, her best friend since the second grade, had talked her into going out with one of his coworkers. Corey worked for one of the best law firms in Chicago and he knew Sam better then she knew herself sometimes, so Sam figured it couldn't be a complete disaster. She finished applying her make-up and took the rollers out of her hair. Everything was turning out as planned, now all Sam needed was to pick out a pair of shoes to go with her new dress. After a brief debate she settled for the silver rhinestone heels slipping them on and gaining four inches in height. She looked at herself again in the mirror and smiled at what she saw. A knock at the door interrupted her reflection gazing and she took another deep breath as she crossed through her studio apartment. Sam opened the door to find a six foot sandy blond haired man in a black Armani suit, red roses in hand. She made a mental note to thank Corey later.

"Hi, I'm Jason Carter, you are Samantha Ryan I hope?"

"Yes, but please call me Sam. Come in and make yourself comfortable, I'll be just a minute."

Sam went back into her bedroom where she reapplied her lip gloss, sprayed more hairspray in her hair and grabbed her clutch. After taking one last look at herself in the mirror she took a deep breath and went to meet Jason.

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><p>The ride to the restaurant was quiet, but it allowed Sam to get her thoughts together. When they arrived Jason was the perfect gentleman, opening the door for her and offering his arm, it had been a while since Sam had received such treatment. Jason had booked a reservation at a fancy uptown Italian restaurant, a little too fancy for Sam's taste, but she was up to trying something new. When they were seated and the waiter took their orders Jason finally broke the long silence.<p>

"So, Corey tells me you're a teacher?"

"Yes, well I just started teaching this year. For the last three years I worked for World Wrestling Entertainment in their divas division."

"You were a wrestler?"

"Well the proper term these days is superstar, but yes I was. I was never top of the division, I was just getting noticed in the company when I decided to end my contract and actually use my college degree."

"Why would you quit? That had to be an exciting job, I'm sure it was rough on your body, but the travel had to have been a perk."

"Well it was for a little bit, but it gets old living out of a suitcase. I actually left because of some personal issues, I was in a relationship and it didn't work out, so I came home."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Well I'm glad you agreed to go out with me, I was pretty nervous about this. I'm not the blind date type."

"I understand completely. Corey wouldn't tell me much more beyond what you did for a living and I was nervous, but I'm glad I said yes. You seem really nice Jason."

The two talked throughout dinner and they seemed to hit it off. At the end of the evening Jason asked Sam if she'd like to go to a movie Saturday and Sam found herself agreeing without hesitation. Sam was ready to move on and focus on something else besides work and Jason seemed to be the perfect focal point.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank so much for the follows and reviews...Continue to review and please recommend this story to others...**

**Once again I own nothing except OCs...**

The next morning Sam got up early and got ready for work. She was in a good mood today, something that wasn't always the case. While sitting down to eat her usual bowl of Cheerios with a sliced banana added in and looking over the newspaper, her phone rang and she smiled to see Corey was calling.

"Good morning Corey, I'm pretty sure I already know why you're calling."

"Am I that predictable? I needed to get the 411 before I headed into the office so I know if I'm getting praise or an earful from Jason."

"Well I hope he praises you. I want to thank you for hooking me up with a very handsome man with a steady job that is the complete opposite of my ex."

"I tried my best to pick out the opposite of him, I'm glad I succeeded."

"Yes you did. The restaurant was a little fancier then I'm used to, but it was nice. We spent most of the evening talking and then he asked if I'd like to catch a movie Saturday."

"You said yes right?"

"Of course I said yes, surprisingly without hesitation!"

"Well I'm glad you two hit it off. Sorry to cut this short, but I'm almost at work, we need to catch up at some point this weekend!"

"Yes I'll make time for you in between grading papers and dates with cute attorneys. Later Corey!"

Sam finished getting ready for the day and headed out the door to catch the subway to work. It had been a long time since Sam had done her student teaching and a lot had happened from that point until now, but she was happy teaching fourth grade. Despite how rusty she was, the principal and superintendent had expressed how impressed they were.

Today being a Friday meant that it would be laid back, even more so because there was a special assembly set up for the end of the day. Sam breezed through the first half the day and before she knew it lunch time had arrived. She made her way to the teachers lounge and sat chatting with her colleagues until Principal Fletcher asked to see her for a minute. Sam excused herself and went through the connecting hallway to the office turning the corner to Principal Fletcher's personal office.

"Yes you wanted to see me?" Sam's face turned bright red when she saw her standing in with Principal Fletcher. Her mind raced with questions, the main one being why the hell was he here.

"Sam I want you to show our guest around the school. Mr. Brooks is here as the Be A Star speaker, it appears Mr. Farrelly is under the weather. I understand you two worked together previously, so I assume there won't be a problem."

"Well I need to get my kids from lunch and we have a few more things to do before the assembly this afternoon." Sam prayed that Principal Fletcher would accept this and choose someone else, she didn't want anything to do with Phillip Brooks.

"Well no need to worry about that, Colleen is taking over your class until the assembly. Any other concerns?"

"No, I guess not, it would be my pleasure to show Mr. Brooks around and make him feel at home." Sam smiled trying to make the expression as genuine as possible. Principal Fletcher returned the gesture and motioned for the two to carry on. Sam stormed back into the teachers lounge grabbing her lunchbox and heading to her classroom, Phil following close behind. When they made it to room 206 Sam closed the door behind him and let out a loud sigh before making eye contact with Phil.

"Why are you here?"

"Well Sam Ryan, fourth grade teacher, never thought you'd actually do it."

"Yeah well I did with no thanks to you, now tell me why are you here?"

"You heard the principal lady, Stephen is sick, so I was called in to replace him. Believe me I don't want to be here giving an anti-bully speech, I've got better things to do on my day off."

"What else is new, you're thinking about yourself!"

"I resent that comment, there were many times when I put you first and you repaid me by leaving the company and our apartment without a single word. My favorite part is where you changed your number so I couldn't even track you down and your shadows, Corey and Mattie, they obviously never liked me because they refused to tell me where you were. When it comes down to it you were just as selfish as I was."

"You know what Phil I'm not here to talk about the past, I've moved on as I'm sure you have too. Let's just do this stupid assembly and then we'll go on living separate lives again."

"Have you really moved on?" Sam swallowed the lump that was rising in her throat. Before she could answer she saw the other fourth grade class coming up the stairs from lunch and she knew her group would be following close behind.

"Just work with me here please! The kids are coming back so you can't be in here. Follow me!" Sam took Phil's hand and dragged him to the library. When they arrived she realized that her fingers were laced with his and immediately let go. She took a deep breath reminding herself to hold it together, this would be over soon and she'd hopefully never have to see Phil Brooks again!


	3. Chapter 3

**Read & Review :) I own nothing except OCs**

At 1:30 the entire school entered the large group room and waited patiently for Principal Fletcher to tell them what the surprise assembly was about. Sam stood with Phil behind a curtain briefing him on what to do and what not to do.

"Please remember you're speaking to a group of children, so watch your mouth."

"Why did you have to say that? You know it'll be that much harder not to curse because you said that."

"I know you and I know you have very little filter from that brain of yours to your mouth, use the small amount you have! I think in most cases you won't have to say much, the kids know who you are."

"Do they know the new fourth grade teacher Miss Ryan used to body slam women twice her size?"

"No, so don't mention it! My former career isn't known to very many people around here and I'd like to leave it that way!" Phil smirked and Sam could feel her heart rate pick up. That smirk could bring Sam to her knees every time and Phil knew it. Any time they would fight he'd throw her that smirk and she'd forget what she was mad about. Wanting to get out of this awkward situation, she quickly wished him luck and went to join her students. Principal Fletcher had just finished praising the students and was about to introduce the special guest.

"I would like you all to put your hands together and show some Wildcat pride for WWE Superstar CM Punk!" The kids went wild as Phil stepped from behind the curtain, his championship title secured around his waist. Sam clapped with the rest of the faculty while biting her cheek to keep from grinning. Once the kids settled down, Phil took a seat on the stage, crossing his legs, microphone in hand and Sam rolled her eyes at his promo ready stance. He started talking to the kids about bullying and the fact that he was bullied as a kid and what bullying can do to a person and what you should do if you're bullied. Sam didn't hear anything he was saying, all she did was stare at him sitting there. His hazel eyes had a light in them that she hadn't seen for a long time and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't stop staring at him. She realized a small part of her missed him. Sam missed the screaming matches that ended in passionate make-up sex, the walks through Chicago and the long nights that they stayed up talking. At one point Phil noticed her staring and took a minute to stare back. In that minute Sam was reminded of the first time Phil said he loved her.

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><p><em>Sam and Phil had been dating for nine months and things were just starting to get rocky. Sam was finishing her final semester at Illinois State and Phil had just started wrestling for Ring of Honor, so there was extra stress in both of their lives that caused turbulence in their relationship. It was a rare weekend where both of them were in Chicago with nothing to do and Sam was looking forward to spending it with Phil. Their schedules had been so hectic lately that they rarely had time to talk on the phone nonetheless actually see each other. Sam used her key to get into Phil's apartment and was surprised to find it empty. She made her way back to the bedroom and dropped her bag by the bed before laying down on it and letting out a deep breath. Her eyes began to drift shut when she heard the phone ring, so she got up and ran to the kitchen, getting there just as the machine picked up. She listened as the beep sounded and Phil's voice came through.<em>

_"Hey Sammy, I tried your cell, but you didn't answer, so I figured you're probably already at my place. About tonight, there's been a last minute change to mid-card and they need me in Rockford, so I won't be there until around midnight. I'm sorry babe, but I can't turn down an opportunity, promise I'll make it up to you. Call me later." Sam picked up the phone and threw it at the wall watching it break._

_"Shit!" As if spending the evening alone wasn't bad enough now she had to buy Phil a new phone. Letting out a deep sigh and pushing her feelings of disappointment aside, she decided to go to the grocery store and grab a movie to watch. If she was spending the evening alone she might as well stock up on Ben & Jerry's and get a good chick flick to go with it._

_Phil didn't make it home until 3:30AM where he found Sam asleep on the couch. He tried his best to be quiet and not to wake her, but at the sound of the door closing she sat up holding her chest. Sam relaxed when she saw Phil and rubbed her eyes letting out a deep yawn._

_"What time is it?"_

_"Uh, it's late. Let's go back to bed Sammy." Sam picked up her phone and saw the time and then threw the phone on the table. Phil could tell she was clearly pissed off._

_"Midnight huh? Where the hell have you been for three and a half hours?"_

_"I went out with some of the guys. I figured you'd be tired and you wouldn't care."_

_"Well you're wrong I do care! What was the point of me even coming here this weekend, obviously I'm not important to you." Sam threw off her blanket and put on a sweatshirt. She reached for her sneakers and started to put them on._

_"Sam you are important to me. You know I'm in a rough spot right now, please don't make a big deal out of this."_

_"Don't make a big deal? You begged me to come up here and I busted my ass to get everything done for school so I could come see you and focus on us. We could have time together where wrestling and school weren't mentioned. I'm glad I'm the only one who held up to that bargain!" Sam tied her shoe and got up off the couch heading towards the door, but Phil stood in her way._

_"Sam I'm sorry, please let's just forget about this and go to bed."_

_"Move Phil!"_

_"No, you're not going outside it's pouring down rain..." Before Phil could finish Sam pushed him aside and slid out the door. Phil punched the wall and immediately regretted doing so. He stood there for a minute and then grabbed his hoodie and went out the door after Sam._

_It was raining harder now then it had been when Phil had gotten home and he could barely see in front of him, but he knew where she was headed. He ran through the puddles feeling his clothes soak through and cling to his skin. He left out a groan and hoped that this was going to be worth it. After running for three blocks, he turned into Grant Park finding her sitting on a bench with her knees pulled to her chest. Without thinking about what to say he walked up to her._

_"Sam you're soaking wet and so am I, can we please forget about this now?"_

_"No! You don't get it, you never will!"_

_"What don't I get?"_

_"I understand that you're trying to build your career, but you're leaving me behind. You never call when you say you will and you can't even be around for a weekend that you planned! I'm done, I can't do this!" Sam got up off the bench and went to walk away, but Phil grabbed her arm forcing her to turn around and look at him._

_"Sammy please don't do this. I'm sorry, I can't even tell you how sorry I truly am. I am a fuck up and you deserve a hell of a lot better then what I give you, but I love you, please don't leave." Sam looked into his hazel eyes, her mouth falling open at what he had just said._

_"What did you say?"_

_"I said a lot of stuff, but most importantly I said I love you. I love you more then anything in my life. I know things are rough right now, but I swear to you if you stay everything will get better." Sam stared at him as a smile formed on her face. Phil pushed her wet chocolate brown hair out of her face and leaned down to kiss her. The kiss deepened as he picked her up off her feet. When they finally parted Phil took Sam's hand in his and they ran back to his apartment to escape the rain._


	4. Chapter 4

**A shorter chapter, but I hope you enjoy! Read & Review, as always I own nothing except OCs.**

Sam was brought back to reality when she heard the student body cheering loudly. She looked up to see Phil was surrounded by kids. Sam knew Phil wasn't the biggest fan of kids unless he knew them personally, but surprisingly he had a smile on his face as he high-fived students of all ages. Sam could feel her cheeks heating up, so she got up and headed to the water fountain needing a minute to pull herself together. Leaning over the water fountain she took a long drink trying to get the dryness out of her throat.

"Don't do this to yourself Sam, it's not worth it, you'll only get hurt in the end." Sam adjusted her sweater, pushing up her sleeves and headed back into the assembly knowing that this experience was almost over.

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><p>Principal Fletcher dismissed the classes by grade and Sam was relieved when she finally got back to her classroom. The kids were buzzing about the assembly, which reminded Sam why she put up with Phil, it made her students happy. While erasing the board, her most outspoken student, Trevor, had decided to ask a few questions.<p>

"Miss Ryan where were you this afternoon?"

"Well Trevor I was helping prep for the assembly."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Sam restrained herself and tried to keep a smile on her face, but Trevor was a difficult child to deal with and she knew he wouldn't leave her alone until he got an answer. Thankfully a knock at the door interrupted her answering his question, however Sam wasn't as thankful to see Phil poke his head in. Her students went silent for the first time all afternoon making the moment even more awkward.

"Sam, I mean Miss Ryan, I just wanted to thank you for your hospitality this afternoon." Sam walked towards Phil putting her hands on his chest and pushing him out into the hallway.

"Why are you still here? You've done your job, go enjoy your day off."

"This is what I get for making a personal visit to thank you. You are never satisfied, I suppose some things never change! Anyway I'm in town for a few days and I was wondering if you wanted to grab lunch or dinner tomorrow."

"Sorry I can't, I have a date."

"A date? So you have moved on, who's the unlucky bastard?"

"Watch your mouth! It's none of your business who I see, I'm no longer any of your concern."

"I'm looking out for you. You shouldn't waste your time on some yuppie who is the opposite of me. Sammy you and I both know that we're meant to be together, you're the only one who deals with my shit and I'm the only one who deals with your bitchiness."

"Get over yourself please! You don't know what's good for me, so don't pretend you do. Thank you for coming today, but I'd appreciate if you left because you've worn out your welcome." Sam opened the door and slammed it behind her, not taking much notice to the 26 sets of eyes that were glued on her.

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><p>Once the students were dismissed for the day Sam checked her phone for texts and messages. She smiled when she saw a text from Jason setting up their movie date for Saturday at 7pm. However, her happy moment faded when she saw a smily face text and realized Phil had some how gotten her number.<p>

"Damnit!" Sam quickly dialed Mattie's cell and was relieved when she picked up. "Mattie please tell me you're not busy tonight!"

"Actually I'm not, are you okay?"

"No I'm not! Meet me at my place in an hour, I'll bring the pizza, you get the Mikes lemonade and plenty of Ben & Jerrys! Call Corey in for reinforcement."

"Oh no this can't be good! You haven't needed both of us, carbs, booze and ice cream since the break up, is he involved in this?"

"Yes! No more questions, just meet me in an hour!" Sam hung up the phone and gathered up her paperwork tossing it in her bag. Grabbing her keys she clicked off the light and hightailed it from the school.


	5. Chapter 5

**Another flashback featured in this chapter...please continue to read & review...I own nothing, especially not CM Punk or Ben & Jerry's even though I adore them both :)**

Forty five minutes later Sam arrived at her apartment, pizza in hand. She quickly changed into shorts and a T-shirt and started eating pizza while waiting for Mattie and Corey to arrive. Mattie arrived at 5 with Sam's alcohol and ice cream requests in hand. As Mattie sat down with her own slice of pizza, Sam popped the top off of a Mikes cranberry lemonade and drank down half the bottle. Mattie eyed her curiously knowing that something really must have gone wrong because Sam rarely drank and when she did she never drank like that.

"What happened today?" Sam plopped down on the brown sofa chair throwing her legs over the side of it.

"Dear God I don't even know where to begin!"

"Well you said on the phone it had something to do with him, where did you see him? Did he see you, talk to you? I need details Samantha!" Sam laughed at Mattie's impatience. She drank down the rest of her lemonade and sat up making eye contact with her former college roommate.

"He has a name, you can say it, honestly it doesn't hurt anymore."

"Sam, please tell me what Phil did."

"It's the story of my life, I move on and the past comes back to haunt me. I had a great time out with Jason last night, he's a nice guy, and it put me in a great mood this morning. Everything was fine at work, the kids worked hard through lunch no problem. At lunch the principal calls me into her office and that's where I saw him."

"Wait, you saw him at school? Is he stalking you? Why was he at school?"

"Well I helped set up a Be A Star visit months ago, but Stephen was scheduled to come in. Mysteriously he falls ill and Phil was booked in his place. The annoying part of the day is that I had to spend the whole afternoon with him." Corey interrupted their conversation when he entered the apartment still wearing his suit jacket, but his tie was loose and the first few buttons on his dress shirt were undone. He took off his jacket tossing it on the couch and rolled up his sleeves before grabbing pizza.

"Wait what am I missing? Who did you spend the afternoon with?" Sam got up and grabbed another Mikes cracking it open and drinking it down just like she did the first one. She sat down on the chair again and noticed Mattie and Corey looking at each other with their eyebrows raised.

"I had to spend the afternoon with Phil, he was at school to do an assembly. Honestly it wasn't a big deal that I had to hang out with him, the big deal is now I can't stop thinking about him. I literally had a flashback while he was talking to the kids and I tried my damndest to be mean to him and hate him and I can't do it."

"No you're not doing this again Sam! Phil is not good for you, Jason talked to me today and he really likes you, don't screw up this great thing to go back to him."

"Corey chill out I never said I was going back to him, but it's just, there are still feelings there that I can't ignore." Mattie got up and went to the freezer getting out a pint of Ben and Jerrys knowing that Sam needed it right now.

"Sam you're always going to have feelings for him. He was pretty much your first for everything and you can't forget your first."

"You're right Mattie, but I wish I could!" Sam drank the rest of her Mikes and started on her ice cream. She put in a movie and decided she didn't want to talk about Phil anymore, mostly because she didn't have anything else to say. She settled on the couch in between her two best friends and tried to convince herself that everything would be okay and she'd forget about Phil. As hard as she tried to block him out she remembered their first time.

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><p><em>By the time Sam and Phil got back to his apartment they were beyond soaked. Phil stripped off his dripping wet clothes tossing them in the sink. He looked at Sam who was shivering.<em>

_"Sammy you need to get those clothes off and get in the shower." Sam nodded at his direction and made her way to the bathroom trying not to leave puddles down the hallway. She stripped off her wet clothes and turned the shower on so that the water was steaming hot. She stood and looked in the mirror thinking about what had just happened and smiled. Phil was in love with her, he had finally said it. She thought to herself for a minute and then decided it was time. Opening the door, she yelled into the hallway._

_"Hey don't you need to warm up too?"_

_"I'm waiting for you. Why do you always take so long in the shower?"_

_"Why wait? We can just shower together." Phil got off the couch and walked down the hallway to bathroom._

_"Did you just suggest what I think you did?" Sam smiled and grabbed his hand pulling him into the bathroom with her. The two started kissing and Sam gradually slipped off Phil's shorts. They carried on their make out session in the steamy shower until neither of them could stand it anymore. After getting out of the shower Phil picked up Sam and her legs wrapped around his waist. He carried her into the bedroom and laid her on the bed where he stopped and stood above her._

_"Is there something wrong?" Sam sat up looking into his hazel eyes._

_"Are you sure this is what you want? I know this is your first time, I don't want you to regret it."_

_Sam smiled at him and he took that as his go ahead cue. Reaching into his nightstand he grabbed a condom and put it on. He laid Sam back down on the bed and began to kiss her neck and shoulders, his hand resting between her legs preparing her for his entrance. He eased his way into her and Sam winced slightly._

_"Are you okay? Do you want me to stop?"_

_"No, I'm okay, just keep going." Phil slid in and out of her and Sam began to relax letting out groans of pleasure. He stopped suddenly and looked into her eyes._

_"I love you Samantha." He leaned down kissing her hard on the mouth as her body shuddered beneath him. After a few more deep thrusts he too succumbed to the pleasure._

_A few minutes later the two laid naked wrapped up in each others arms, the only sound was the rain hitting the window. Sam looked into Phil's eyes as they laid facing each other._

_"I love you Phillip and I always will." He smiled at her, kissing her on the forehead as she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep._


	6. Chapter 6

**Read & Review...I own nothing...Enjoy!**

The next morning Sam woke up with one hell of a headache and when she looked at the table she saw that she had drank an entire six pack of Mikes. She groaned and laid back down on the couch. Staring at the ceiling she thought about last night and the fact that Phil was on her mind the whole time. Corey didn't like Phil, he never had. Corey was a month and 17 days older then Sam, so he took it upon himself to be the big brother she never had and he made it known that he didn't think Phil was good enough for her.

Mattie on the other hand was a Phil fan, but that was mostly because Mattie knew Phil long before Sam did. Mattie had actually introduced the two when her then boyfriend Colt brought Phil with him when he came to visit her. Sam wasn't smitten with Phil from the start, but his charm and that smirk quickly changed her mind.

Sam finally got the energy to get off the couch and found a note from Mattie on the kitchen counter along with two Advil. She popped the pills into her mouth and got a bottle of water from the fridge. Usually on a Saturday at this time Sam would be knee deep in grading papers, but that wasn't going to happen today. She decided it was a nice day to take a walk through the city and perhaps buy something new for her date tonight. Slipping on her jeans, white T and a zip up sweatshirt, she pulled her hair into a ponytail and grabbed her bag before heading out the door.

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><p>Sam window shopped for a while mostly just taking in the fresh, crisp air that fall had to offer. She finally made it to her favorite boutique and decided to stop inside. Perusing the racks she found the cutest purple top that would go with her new shoes she had bought a few weeks before. She grabbed the shirt and headed towards the dressing room. Slipping it on, it fit perfectly, accenting all the right areas. She glanced at the price tag and cringed to see this cute little blouse was $120!<p>

"This is when I miss being a diva, the paycheck was much more then my salary now!" Sam slipped off the shirt replacing it with her t-shirt. Securing it on the hanger, she exited the dressing room still staring at what she couldn't have. Because she wasn't paying attention to where she was walking, she walked right into someone.

"I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention." She looked up and met a familiar pair of hazel eyes. "Actually I'm not sorry, are you following me now?"

"Please don't flatter yourself! My sister dragged me in here, this is the last place I'd like to be."

"Oh, I apologize for jumping to conclusions."

"Yeah you should! What are you doing in here, shopping for your hot date?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes." Sam placed the perfect shirt back on the rack and headed towards something in her price range.

"You're not getting the purple sparkly tube top thing?"

"That's nowhere close to being a tube top and there's not a sparkle on it, but no I'm not getting it."

"Why not? I could tell by how mesmerized you were you liked it."

"I do like it, but my budget doesn't. I love my job, but it does not come with the perks that being a diva came with, my salary isn't even close to the same amount!" Phil nodded and headed over to the dressing rooms to talk to his sister.

"Hey if you need me I'll be across the street at the comic book store." Sam rolled her eyes when he said this, he had an obsession with comic books and graphic novels that she could never understand. Before he left he walked over to her.

"It was nice to see you again, I'll text you later."

"Yeah, I'd rather you didn't text me at all. We're exes Phil, we'll never be friends, we have too much history for that to happen." He nodded at her and headed out the door.

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><p>Sam settled for a pale pink top that was similar to the purple one, but it still wasn't the same. The pink shirt was half the price, so she went with it and made her way to the register. The sales lady rang up the pink top and put it into a bag and then grabbed the purple top from behind the counter and put it into the bag as well.<p>

"Wait, I only want the pink shirt." The sales lady looked at Sam a puzzled look on her face.

"Well the purple blouse has already been paid for."

"Excuse me? I don't understand."

"The gentleman who was in here, he brought it up to the counter and paid for it before he left. You're Samantha right?" She nodded at the woman and tapped her fingers on the counter, clearly annoyed. Sam paid for the pink shirt and grabbed her bag, walking out of the boutique and heading to the comic book store. She found Phil in the back corner perusing the Brubaker graphic novels.

"Can you explain to me what this is?" She pulled the purple blouse from her bag.

"It looks like a purple shirt to me."

"Don't be a smart ass! Why did you buy this for me?"

"Well I could tell you liked it and you deserved to have it. Just promise me you won't wear it on your date with whatever douche bag you're going out with tonight." Sam shoved the shirt into Phil's chest.

"I can't accept this, I won't accept it." Phil took the shirt and draped it over Sam's shoulder.

"Sammy purple isn't my color and even if it was it's a bit too flamboyant for me. Just take it without arguing with me. Consider it a gift for being so nice to me yesterday, you never could say no to a gift!" Sam rolled her eyes and put the shirt back in the bag.

"Don't pull anything like this again! I'm perfectly fine on my own, I have a good job and I make my own money. I don't need you or anyone else buying me gifts." Sam turned on her heel and headed toward the door.

"A simple thank you would have been fine. You're welcome by the way, have fun with your new lover boy!" Sam's face was red with anger and she walked at a fast pace to get home. When she finally closed the door behind her she felt the sting of tears in her eyes and she hated that he still got to her after all this time, but more then anything she hated that after a year she still loved him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Sam has now encountered Phil two times and she's shaken up to say the least! Another flashback this time, I wonder what triggers it! As always Read & Review and I don't own anything besides OCs even though I wish I did!**

It took some time, but Sam managed to pull herself together and get ready for her movie date with Jason. As much as she loved the purple top and it matched her shoes perfectly, she shoved it in the back of her closet. She put on her new pink blouse and accented it with a black scarf. She settled for her black knee high boots that she wore with her dark wash skinny jeans. Her hair was in soft waves around her face, silver hoop earrings in her ears. It took a while, but the redness in her eyes had faded away and she was ready to spend the evening with a great guy where she didn't have to think about, talk about or see Phillip Brooks.

Jason arrived at exactly 7 and Sam grabbed her jacket and clutch and headed towards the car. Just like their Thursday night date he was the perfect gentleman opening the door for her and offering his arm. Sam was feeling a little bold, so she took his hand lacing her fingers with his as they walked towards the movie theatre.

"So we never talked about what movie to see."

"It's your choice, I'm used to seeing guy movies on dates, so any choice will suffice." Jason looked over the choices and glanced at Sam before going up the the ticket booth.

"I'll take two for 'The Vow' please." Sam smiled, she had never gone to the movies with a guy who would willingly watch a sappy chick flick. She had to drag Phil to see "The Notebook" and he actually fell asleep at one point. Jason came over to her, taking her hand again, and led them in to the movie theatre.

Two hours later Sam went to the ladies room to fix he makeup. She had cried more then she expected she would, but chalked it up to the emotional roller coaster she had been on the last few days. Jason was waiting on a bench in the hallway for her when she finally emerged.

"I'm sorry I picked such a sappy movie, I didn't think you'd cry so much."

"It's not a big deal, I'm always sappy with chick flick movies." Jason smiled at her and she smiled back, but was surprised that she didn't feel weakness in her knees and her heart rate was completely normal.

"Anyway, what do you say we go get dessert somewhere?"

"Sounds great." The two walked hand in hand to a diner by the theatre and Sam was surprised when Jason sat across from her and not beside her. Nonetheless she kept a smile on her face. She looked over the dessert menu and decided what the perfect dessert would be to share.

"What do you think about the ice cream mountain?"

"What is that?"

"It's eight scoops of vanilla and chocolate ice cream topped with hot fudge, peanut butter, chopped peanuts, fresh whipped cream and of course a cherry on top!"

"That's a lot, way too many calories! I think I'm just going to get the apple pie. What about you?"

"Oh, well I'll just get the small sundae." Jason could see the slight disappointment on her face.

"Sam I'm sorry, but I take pride in my body. I work out two hours a day and that would destroy me."

"I understand completely. I usually don't eat that kind of thing a lot." Sam lied thinking about the pint and a half of Ben & Jerry's she ate the night before.

"I don't know how you feel about organic food, but there's a great whole foods store here in the city that offers a lot of great produce."

"Yes I'm aware, I lived right by it. Honestly the organic stuff is okay, but I don't see the hype in it." Jason looked surprised by this and proceeded to take the next 20 minutes to explain the benefits of eating organically. Sam zoned out and ate her ice cream remembering the first time she tried organic food. It was also the first time she cooked for Phil and it was a disaster.

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><p><em>After graduating, Sam moved into Phil's apartment despite her parents wishes. She was looking for a teaching job, but until she found one she spent her days working at the local gym. It had its perks, she got a free membership out of it and the pay wasn't horrible. It also helped that the guys working out weren't exactly hideous.<em>

_One thing she always looked forward to when she was in school was making Phil dinner. The first month after she moved in they saw very little of each other because he was on the road a lot. Sam understood and dealt with it, but she finally put her foot down and demanded that Phil take at least one weekend off a month to spend with her and surprisingly he agreed. Tonight was the first night that Sam was going to cook him dinner and she had found the perfect recipe. Living by the whole foods store Sam was intrigued by eating organically and some of the food wasn't too bad. When she picked her recipe she decided to shop there seeing it was close to home. An hour and $65 later Sam made her way back to the apartment and unloaded everything in the kitchen. Phil was sitting on the couch watching the Cubs game when she started cooking._

_Phil knew he had to be patient with Sam cooking, but he was starving, so he figured he'd try to help in hopes of pushing the process along. He stood in the kitchen doorway and grinned at the puzzled look on Sam's face as she tried to make sense of the recipe card in her hand._

_"Do you need any help?"_

_"No, I'm fine, I think. I just need a minute or two here. Dinner will be ready in the next 20 minutes."_

_"Sammy I don't want to sound like a jerk, but you said that an hour ago. You look a little overwhelmed, can I please help?" Sam thought about his offer, but before she could answer the smoke alarm went off. Sam opened the oven and smoke came pouring out._

_"What the hell? It said 20 minutes, I set the timer, it hasn't even gone off!" Phil put a hand over his mouth to hide the laugh that was escaping him._

_"I may have forgotten to mention that timer is broken." Sam's eyes welled up with tears and she threw the oven mitt onto the counter and stormed past Phil into their bedroom. "Come on Sammy, please don't do this!" Phil ran down the hallway after her, but she slammed the door in his face. He took a deep breath and slowly opened the door peaking his head in. Sam was laying on the bed, her face hidden by a pillow. Phil laid down beside her leaning his chin on her shoulder. "It's not a big deal Sam, it was my fault not yours. We'll just make something else." Sam took the pillow from her face and held it close to her chest._

_"Tonight was supposed to be special."_

_"Tonight is special because I'm with you and I don't need some fancy organic dinner as long as I have you."_

_"You really mean that?"_

_"Of course I do, you know I never lie to you. I love you even if you aren't the best in the kitchen." Sam took the pillow from her hands and hit Phil with it._

_"I am really good in the kitchen, my mama taught me how to cook. Your kitchen and organic food just hate me."_

_"Well get used to the kitchen, you're stuck with it for now. I'll buy you a timer that works. For now though I'm starving, can we please make something or go get something!" Sam looked at Phil a sexy smirk on her lips._

_"I'm hungry too, but it's not for food." Sam pushed Phil onto his back and strattled him leaning down to nibble his ear._

_"Yeah food isn't so important anymore!" He took Sam's face in his hands and and kissed her, she returned the kiss by pushing her tongue into his mouth, feeling his cold lip ring brush across her lips. Her hands went to the belt on his jeans and she quickly undid it grasping him in her hands. He let out a groan as she continued to take control, doing things she'd never done before._

_When they were finished Sam laid her head on Phil's chest as they both tried to catch their breath. "Sammy I don't care if you can cook or not, if you can continue to do that I'll forget all about food." Sam let out a laugh as she looked up at him._

_"Lucky for you I can cook and do that. Now I'm hungry for food, you're buying dinner!"_


	8. Chapter 8

**Jumping ahead a few months to keep the story going, but don't worry there are plenty of twists and turns to come and Phil Brooks isn't going anywhere! I don't own anything other then original characters and my own fantasy world!**

**Read & Review! Enjoy :)**

A few months went by and Sam continued to see Jason. Every time she thought about ending it he'd do something to surprise her and it would renew her faith in him and their relationship. One evening after the first snow fall, the two were cuddled up on his couch in front of the fireplace talking about their families when Sam got an idea.

"So Jason, please stop me if you think this is too soon, but I have a break from school coming up and I'd like you to come home with me. I've told my mom a lot about you and she really wants to meet you, but if it's too soon I understand completely."

"Actually it's funny you ask this. My family is going skiing in Aspen at the end of the month and they want me to bring you along."

"Skiing in Aspen Colorado? As long as they don't frown upon me snowboarding instead I'd love to join them." Sam smiled and she was excited, she was just more excited about a snowboarding opportunity then meeting his family.

"Great, I'll tell my mom you're in. As far as your family goes I'd be honored to meet them, just let me know when you're heading home so I can take some personal time off." Sam leaned up and kissed Jason and pulled away quickly like she always did. Things had yet to get physical between the two of them and she wasn't sure how she felt. When she kissed him it was nice, but she didn't feel engrossed in it like she did with Phil. She chalked it up to the fact that his kisses were different because he was her first serious relationship.

Jason surprised Sam when he leaned back toward her and kissed her again this time deepening it. Sam closed her eyes and let Jason take control. His hands started to wonder up her shirt grasping her right breast and Sam let out a sigh. He moved to unclasp her bra and she opened her eyes and pushed him away. The look on his face was one of confusion and Sam searched her head for an excuse.

"Jason I'm sorry, I'm just not ready for that."

"I'm sorry Sam, I just thought, I don't know what I thought."

"It's fine, really. I'm going to head out, I'll call you later." Before Jason could say anything else she grabbed her coat and her bag and left his apartment. She started walking home trying to get a grip on what had just happened. She liked the way Jason made her feel and was okay with having sex, but what she didn't like was that she pictured Phil touching her instead of Jason. She hadn't seen him in months, so why the hell was she still hung up on him?

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><p>When Sam got home she immediately called Mattie, she needed advice from another woman to hopefully fix this screwed up situation. Sam dialed not even noticing it was after midnight, but Mattie answered anyway with sleep still in her voice.<p>

"Sam it's after midnight, what's going on?"

"Mattie I'm sorry for calling so late, but I really need someone to talk to right now." Mattie threw off her blankets and grabbed her jeans.

"From the sounds of it you need me there in person, give me 20 minutes." Sam hung up the phone and wiped the fresh tears from her eyes. Sitting in her house was making her stir crazy, so she sent Mattie a quick text to meet her at Millennium Park. Sam put her hat, scarf and coat back on and headed out the door.

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><p>The air was cold, but it was warmer then usual for December. As she walked her thoughts were one big jumble on her head, all she wanted was to make them go away. When Sam arrived at the park she took a seat on a bench close to the entrance to wait for Mattie. Her leg<br>bounced up and down as she fidgeted to stay warm and because of her nerves, finally after 15 minutes of waiting Mattie walked over to her.

"Can you tell me why you decided to meet in the park? It's December, I'm too old to deal with this cold bullshit." Sam felt herself lighten up and smile a little bit.

"Okay, I'll cut right to the chase. So when I'm with Jason I don't feel what I think I should be feeling. He's a nice guy, funny and good looking, but I see him like I see Corey, we're better off friends."

"You called me at 12:30 in the morning to tell me you're not on love with the guy you're dating? Seriously Sam?"

"No, I needed to talk to you about what happened tonight. I talked to Jason about coming home with me for the holidays in hopes that if he meets my folks and they love him I'll start to love him too."

"I'm gonna have to stop you there and tell you that's not going to work. Have you forgotten Phil meeting your parents? They didn't like anything about him, but it didn't stop you from staying with him."

"That's very true, but under the circumstances of how they found us when they showed up for their surprise visit I could kind of understand their feelings toward him. Anyway, about Phil, tonight Jason and I are on the couch talking about meeting each others families and he starts getting physical. We're making out, hands are roaming, he goes to unsnap my bra and I opened my eyes and freaked."

"Well Sam obviously you're not ready to be physical with him."

"Mattie please! I haven't had sex in over a year, I'd be physical with anyone given the chance. The reason I freaked was because in my mind I wasn't being touched by Jason, I was being touched by Phil."

"Dear God you make everything complicated!"

"Yes I'm aware! I don't understand why I'm still thinking about him. It's done, I left, I haven't even seen him in almost four months, so why can't I forget about him?" Tears flooded Sam's eyes as she buried her head in her hands. Mattie comforted her friend the best she could.

"Sam something is holding you to him. I don't know what it is, but maybe you need to sit down and talk to him. You can't move on with your life until you confront your past." Sam wiped at her eyes and gave Mattie a hug. She knew what was holding her back and she knew what she had to do to move forward.

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><p><strong>Story aside I'm getting psyched for Wrestlemania...Punk vs Jericho, it won't be a let down! Ten man battle royal was one of the most entertaining parts of Raw last night and I think I'm bias bc Punk was on commentary and I love when that happens...anytime you can shut Michael Cole up and throw out some random, funny one liners I'm in! The camel fur jacket was adorable as well :)**

**If I get a chance I'm going to try to post again after Smackdown tonight...Punk vs Daniel Bryan rematch, it was good the first time around, hope it's even better this time around!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Prepare yourself for this one...there is some language in here that some may deem offensive or inappropriate, but it needs to be in there...read on and you'll see why!**

**Read & Review...I own nothing...blah blah blah**

Mattie offered to stay with Sam for the night, but Sam insisted she'd be okay. As she got into the cab to head home she realized what she had to do. Looking at her phone she saw it was just before 2AM, so she took a chance having the taxi detour to Phil's apartment. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep until she unloaded her secret, and she knew if Phil was home he'd be up, hopefully he was alone. The last thing Sam wanted was an awkward encounter between her ex and another woman! The cab slowed down and finally came to a stop in front of Phil's apartment, the same apartment Sam had abandoned over a year before. She noticed there was a light on where the living room was and took a deep breath before walking inside. Standing outside his door she hesitated for a minute, debating if she should go through with this or not. In the end she knew she had to tell him the truth, he deserved to know and it was the only way Sam could truly move on. Holding her breath she knocked on the door, secretly hoping that he wasn't home and he wasn't awake even though she knew he was. After a minute the door opened and Phil's face had a look of confusion.

"Sammy, it's 2 in the morning. What are you doing here? Are you okay?" Sam was quiet for a minute as she searched for words.

"I know it's late and I'm sorry for showing up like this, but I need to tell you something that I should have told you a long time ago." Phil chewed on his lip ring and moved aside allowing Sam to enter. Looking around the living room Sam noticed Phil hadn't changed anything since she left, perhaps the only difference was a bigger TV.

"So what is it you need to talk to me about?" Phil sat on the couch motioning for Sam to join him. She sat on the other end of the couch and avoided eye contact twirling an old ring on her right finger.

"I really don't know how to say this, but I know I have to. You deserve to know what really happened, why I really left."

"What do you mean? I already know why, I was a jerk and neglected you, so you got fed up and left with intentions to never see or speak to me again."

"Phil that's not it. I did something that I'm not proud of. No one else knows about it except the other person." Phil sat up and looked at her, tears were streaming down her face, her body shaking.

"Sammy what is it? I've never seen you like this."

"It was right after you won the championship, you were always so busy and you constantly broke promises to me. You weren't affectionate at all and I convinced myself that you didn't want to be with me anymore. The week before I left I went out and drank a lot hoping to forget about how unhappy I was. I got really drunk and I wound up sleeping with someone." Sam sobbed heavily after letting the secret out. She had been so ashamed of the whole incident she'd never told anyone until now.

"Who was it?" Phil's voice was barely above a whisper, but Sam could tell he was hurt. Composing herself so she could speak she finally looked at him. His hazel eyes were glazed over and staring a hole straight through her.

"It doesn't matter who it was. We both agreed it was a mistake because he was in a relationship too. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner, but I knew what I did was unforgivable."

"Tell me who it was. Tell me why you went to him instead of coming to me. Tell me why you're coming to me now! I have blamed myself for fucking up the best thing I ever had for over a year and now you tell me you fucked someone else because you felt neglected!" Phil's voice had gotten louder as he went on and he was now pacing the floor refusing to look at Sam.

"I thought you deserved to know the real reason why I left. I've tried to move on with my life and I'm constantly haunted by this. I hate that I hurt you then and I hate myself more now for hurting you again, but I didn't know what else to do!" Sam got up to leave, but Phil grabbed her wrist and pinned her against the wall. He had never done anything like this before and Sam didn't know what he was going to do.

"Tell me who it was." Sam felt more tears fall down her face and she knew he wouldn't rest until she came clean completely.

"It was Matt Cardona." He let go of her wrists and punched the wall Sam was leaning against causing her to scream.

"Well Samantha I hope you feel better now that you've confessed your sins. Get the fuck out, I don't ever want to see your face again. You are a heartless bitch and I hope you realize sooner rather then later that I was the best thing you ever had. I don't think you even realize how in love with you I was and you threw it away on a worthless fuck." Phil stormed back the hallway slamming the bedroom door behind him. Sam was stunned at how angry Phil had been, but as she thought about it this was how he was supposed to react. Grabbing her things she walked out of his apartment and collapsed in the hallway. After a few more minutes of hysteria, she made it outside and called Corey.

"Sammy it's after 2AM, what's going on?"

"I need you to come get me. I'm having an anxiety attack and I can barely breath." Corey heard her still heavy sobs coming through the phone and had quickly gotten dressed, running downstairs to grab his keys.

"Sam please calm down, take deep breaths. Where are you?"

"I'm outside Phil's apartment." He left out a sigh, but knew now was not the time to lecture her or ask a bunch of questions.

"I'll be there in 10 minutes, just stay calm."

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><p><strong>I'm sure Sammy isn't so liked anymore, but it had to happen...someone who is liked in my book CM Punk! Great match tonight against Daniel Bryan...I really hope the two of them headline Wrestlemania sooner rather then later! Also Punk posting that video in response to Chris Brown was epic in my book...Hope you enjoyed the update :)<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks so much for all the reviews and to those of you that have added this story to your favorites :) Here's a short chapter to hold you over for a few days!**

**A big bombshell dropped by Sam and now Corey has to come to the rescue...I own nothing...Read & Review!**

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><p>Corey carried Sam from the car into her apartment. She had stopped sobbing, but her breath was still shallow. He'd never seen her like this and it made him want to kick Phil's ass for hurting her and throwing her out on the street in the state she was in. Laying her on the couch, Corey went into the kitchen and got her a nerve pill and a bottle of water. He knew Sam hated taking her emergency anxiety meds, but she needed to calm down. After helping her take off her coat he gave her the pill and she surprisingly took it without putting up a fight. The two sat on the couch, Corey's arm around Sam's shoulder as he comforted his best friend.<p>

"Sam why were you at Phil's tonight?"

"I had to see him."

"I don't understand, I thought you were done with him. You're with Jason now."

"It's different with Phil."

"Samantha what did he do to upset you?"

"He hates me, he'll never forgive me for what I did. He told me I'm a heartless bitch and he's right, I am."

"He broke your heart! You are not a heartless bitch, he's a gutless coward who can't face the fact that he is the one that ruined your relationship!" Sam sat up and made eye contact with Corey.

"He's not a coward and me leaving wasn't his fault. I cheated on him Corey."

"Sam you're exhausted and saying ridiculous things, maybe it's time for bed."

"It's not ridiculous Corey, it happened. I felt neglected and rather then talking to Phil about it I went out drinking one night, got really drunk and slept with Matt Cardona. I tried to forget about it and act like it never happened, but the guilt got to me and I left. I kept the whole thing a secret and didn't tell anyone until tonight."

All Corey could do was stare at his best friend who had never kept anything from him until now. He was angry and upset, but decided now was not the time to express those feelings. Getting up from the couch, Corey grabbed his jacket and opened the door making sure it was locked behind him. Sam stared at her shaking hands as she laid back on the couch. She had never felt more alone in her life, but she knew she had brought it on herself.


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry for keeping you waiting (2 days might not be long for some, but I get antsy!)...I spent yesterday in line getting my Raw tickets for May and I'm looking forward to sitting 5 rows back...wish it would've been front and center, but those aren't easy to get! Oh well, I'm five rows back from the announcers so I'll be sure to heckle Michael Cole :)**

**Keep the reviews and follows coming...I have a lot of new stuff in the works for when I wrap up this story :)**

**Things aren't going well for Sam...First she loses Phil and now possibly one of her best friends...I own nothing, R&R :) **

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><p>The next morning Sam woke up still feeling emotionally exhausted. She was glad it was Sunday and she didn't have to work and decided the best way to spend her day was resting. There was still another full week before school let out for winter break and she knew she had to find a way to get through it. Rolling onto her side she gripped her body pillow tighter as the tears started to fall again. Just as she closed her eyes her phone began vibrating from the night stand. Looking at it, she saw Jason was calling. Sam knew she owed him an explanation for running out on him, but she didn't have one. Wiping at her eyes and clearing her throat she answered the phone.<p>

"Hi Jason."

"Hey Samantha, I was just calling to see if you were okay. You rushed out of here pretty quickly last night and I was worried I did something to upset you."

"No it was nothing, I just wasn't expecting that to happen. It's okay though, I overreacted."

"Well I was wondering what you were up to today. I thought maybe you would want to go shopping for some snow boarding gear for our trip to Aspen." Sam chewed on her lip searching for an excuse.

"That sounds great, but I'm feeling under the weather today, so I'm just going to stay in bed and rest up."

"Oh well let me know if you need anything. I'll call you later."

"Okay, goodbye Jason." Sam curled back up under the covers gripping her body pillow tight to her chest as she thought to herself. The whole point of talking to Phil last night was so that she could move on with her life, however all it resulted in was her feeling stuck in the same place. She had brought an extreme amount of pain to both herself and Phil and Jason still wasn't what she wanted.

Sitting up in bed, she grabbed some clothes and threw them on making her way to the bathroom. When she looked in the mirror all she saw was the walking dead, so she grabbed some sunglasses to cover her tired, swollen, sunken eyes. Throwing her hair into a messy bun and grabbing her coat she went for a walk through the city to clear her head and try to figure out what it was she wanted.

Sam wondered around the city for two hours before she realized she was within blocks of Phil's apartment. She let out a deep sigh realizing she was setting herself up for more hurt then she already felt and decided to sit on a bench in Grant Park to think. Sipping her caramel latte she watched as people passed by her holding hands and pushing strollers, the perfect pictures of how life is supposed to be. Sam couldn't help but feel the pain in her chest as she admitted that she didn't have that kind of happiness and there was no one to blame but herself. Tightening the scarf around her neck to protect her from the wind chill, Sam thought back to the last time she felt this way. Ironically she had come to this same park when she made the decision to leave Phil based on her own selfish needs and underlying guilt. She had spent the whole day sitting in that park debating on what to do and now she wondered if that decision led to the biggest mistake of her life.

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><p><em>It was an early September morning and Sam had just gotten back to Chicago after a long two weeks of traveling. She dropped her bags off at the apartment she shared with Phil, but couldn't stand to stay there as it brought her to feel more guilt then she could stand. She grabbed a zip up hoodie and headed out into the city without any idea of where she was going.<em>

_Things with Phil had been exceptionally rough lately. He was in high demand as the new face of the company while Sam's career wasn't going anywhere. She thought back to the day she signed up for wrestling school and shook her head realizing she did it for all the wrong reasons. Phil had just been signed to the WWE and she knew his travel schedule would be much more hectic then it had been with ROH. They didn't see enough of each other as it was, so rather then taking a chance with their relationship, Sam convinced herself that she wanted to wrestle and began her diva training. She actually loved it in the beginning, something about getting your ass kicked everyday was exhilarating, plus the workouts had gotten her in the best shape of her life. Once she was signed though she realized that wrestling was not her passion. The only perk was the traveling and even that got old after a while. The crazy part was Sam only went into the business with hopes of staying with Phil and they saw less of each other now then they ever had!_

_Sam had already made a call to the front office to end her contract, but now she had to figure out what to do with her personal life. Her relationship with Phil had already been complicated and her drunken night with Matt made things worse. She thought about coming clean with Phil, but knew he'd be beyond hurt. The two had been together for almost seven years and it broke Sam's heart to know she had thrown everything away to feel needed for one night._

_Sitting on a bench in Grant Park Sam drank her latte and took in her surroundings. Everyone seemed so happy and here she was, completely miserable! She sat at the park for almost eight hours before she finally made her decision. Phil was better off without her, he was strong enough to move on, so she headed back to their apartment to pack._

_She talked to Mattie about what was going on and her friend opened her home without thinking twice. Sam hadn't told her about her big mistake because she had decided it was best to keep it to herself. She packed the last of her things into a box and gave the place one last look through. Tears flowed from her eyes when she realized Phil would be home next week and Sam wouldn't be there to greet him. She'd be gone, trying her best to move on and he'd be left without an explanation._


	12. Chapter 12

**Sam isn't in the best state of mind, let's see if it gets any better...perhaps a trip home for the holidays can cure it, or will it make things worse? R&R, as always I own nothing except OCs...**

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><p>Sam barely made it through the week, but when her students were dismissed Friday she felt a small sense of relief lifted off of her, but nothing to make a significant change. A number of her coworkers and even Principal Fletcher had showed concern for her, but she convinced them she was okay, but Sam could tell no one believed her.<p>

When she finally got home she immediately got to packing. Her flight to her parents house in Seattle was leaving early the next morning and she had a lot to do before then. Despite her concerns about her feelings for Jason he was still coming home with her and for some reason she found it a good thing. Jason had been very patient with her throughout the week and Sam felt that she needed to stick to the plan of the two of them meeting each others families. Granted Mattie had pointed out that just because her parents might fall in love with Jason didn't mean that Sam would, but she was taking a chance. He made her feel comfortable with herself and had a weird way of making her forget everything, well everything except her ex, it seemed like nothing could make her forget about him.

It had been almost a week since Sam came clean to Phil and she hadn't heard from him, not that she expected to, but she hated that seven years that were filled with love had ended with him feeling hate and disdain for her. Sam figured she had to keep pushing on with her life because there was no way that Phil would ever be willing to give her a second chance and she knew she didn't deserve one.

In the middle of packing she was interrupted by a knock at the door and found Jason on the other side. A smile appeared on her lips as she moved aside to let him in, his suitcase trailing behind him. He greeted her with a peck to the cheek, and Sam returned the greeting by placing her mouth on his in a sweet kiss. Jason smiled at her as he took off his coat and followed her back to her room so she could continue packing. Sam folded her clothes placing them carefully in her Louis Vuitton luggage, one of the expensive things she decided she needed when she was a diva. Now she was lucky if she used the luggage set once a year!

"So what can I expect from your family?"

"Well I am exactly like my dad. We're the calm ones in the family and we'd rather spend the day outside or listening to music then doing anything else. While I act like my dad I look exactly like my mom. Compliment her cooking, she likes that and she's good at it, so the compliments come easy. As for my brother, he'll never grow up! My parents baby him, but I find myself doing the same thing from time to time. There's seven years between us, so he's more like my first born then my sibling."

"Interesting, so look forward to good food and hospitality. Are you ready for Aspen? I booked an early flight that leaves Thursday morning."

"Thursday morning? It'll be rough seeing we won't be back until Wednesday afternoon, but I'll be ready. I have my winter gear out of storage, so I'm ready with that and I'll have Mattie get what I need from the dry cleaners."

"Corey said he'd help out." Sam's smile faded. She hadn't talked to Corey since he left clearly disgusted when she told him the truth about her relationship with Phil.

"Well that's nice of him, but we haven't talked for about a week."

"What is up with that? You two talk at least once a day, what happened?"

"Well Corey and I have never had secrets, we've always told each other everything no matter how embarrassing or messed up it is. I did something a little over a year ago and I chose to keep it to myself. It came out last week and he was very hurt that I kept it from him, but I didn't want to believe it, so I tried to hide it in hopes I'd forget about it."

"So your friendship is damaged over some stupid secret? You guys need to work it out. You've been best friends forever, there's no point in throwing it away over something silly."

"You're right. I'll let him cool off a bit and I'll make sure I talk to him when we come back from jet setting." Sam put the last of her clothes in her bag and zipped it closed, rolling it to the front hall and setting it beside Jason's. There was a lot Sam needed to fix and Corey was at the top of her list. For some reason Phil was on that list too even though she knew she'd never be able to fix that. Their relationship was beyond broken.

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><p><strong>The only good thing about Monday's is Raw is on tonight...hope everyone is watching! Keep adding this story to your favorites and sending those reviews :)<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

**Great Raw tonight...figured I'd post another chapter because of it...Loved the Punk/Jericho promo at the beginning and I would bet money that those two will steal the show at Mania and be the true main event**

**Sam is headed to Seattle with Jason to meet the Ryan Family...will she find a way to love him, or will her memories of a certain WWE Superstar continue to haunt her...R&R, I own only OCs...Keep following and reviewing, I love getting those e-mails from you guys :)**

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><p>Sam and Jason boarded their flight at 8AM Saturday morning. Despite feeling calm the night before, Sam was beginning to get nervous about the idea of Jason meeting her family. After all she hadn't had the best track record with bringing guys home!<p>

Her parents hadn't taken to Phil the way she hoped they would, but it didn't help that their first meeting happened when her parents walked in on them in a very compromising position.

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><p><em>Sam thought back to the first time Phil made the trip to Washington. It was after Sam had graduated and Phil had managed to get some time off over the holidays. Despite his best efforts for them to spend the holidays alone in Chicago, he could tell that she was homesick. He knew that no matter what he did she still wouldn't be satisfied, so he booked a flight for the two of them to Seattle. Upon arriving everything seemed to go smoothly. Phil was getting along with Sam's parents and he already had a great relationship with her brother, but things didn't stay perfect for long.<em>

_On Christmas day everything started out as usual in the Ryan household. Gifts were exchanged and music was played throughout the house. Phil was playing video games with Sam's brother Matt, so she made her way to the kitchen to help her mom with dinner. In the middle of rolling stuffing balls, Sam's mother started the same lecture she always did._

_"Samantha when are you moving back home?"_

_"What? Not this again!"_

_"You're family is here, you should be close. Instead you're in Chicago living in sin and working at a gym. Your father didn't work half of his life to build you a college fund so that you could waste your degree and work at a gym."_

_"Mom we've been over this! Chicago is my new home. I left the nest like you're supposed to and that's where I wound up. I'm not going to work at the gym forever. As far as living in sin it's not the 1960s anymore, it's normal for couples to live together and not be married."_

_"Samantha I just don't know what you see in him. What kind of life can he provide for you as a professional wrestler? He needs to grow up and get a real career!"_

_"This coming from the woman who has two grown kids, but still works as a homemaker. I'm so tired of you putting him down! You should be happy that I found someone in this world that loves me for me and treats me better then anyone else ever has. Also for your information he was just signed to the WWE, so your opinions don't matter." Sam stormed out of the kitchen grabbing her jacket and leaving out the front door slamming it behind her. Phil noticed Sam's dad start to get up from his chair, but he held up his hand and got up first to go find Sam._

_Sam sat on a swing in the backyard kicking at the ground beneath her as she rocked back and forth. Phil watched her for a minute before he approached her, clearing his throat to get her attention._

_"Can I ask what happened?"_

_"My mother is just being ridiculous as usual. I don't know why I care about what she thinks. I'm 21 years old and I live a pretty decent life. I have a place to live and a job, I don't ask them for anything."_

_"So what's the problem then? Why did you let Paula get to you?"_

_"Because she's constantly telling me to find someone better. She insists you're not good enough and it pisses me off. She doesn't know you like I know you." Phil rubbed the back of his neck and sat down beside Sam._

_"Well she's not the only one who has an opinion of me. Based on my tattoos people automatically associate me with trouble. I'm used to not being liked, it doesn't bother me."_

_"It bothers me! She should be happy that her only daughter found someone who loves her and treats her extremely well. I don't care if I never speak to her again."_

_"As flattering as that might be it's not okay to quit speaking to your mother. I know you two don't have the greatest relationship, but you do have a bond and I don't want to be the reason for that breaking. The next few months are going to be rough with me switching companies and the travel will be more demanding. You're probably going to hate me more then you love me, you'll need someone to vent to and you're mom will be one of those people." Sam let out a sigh because she knew Phil was right._

_"I know all that's true, but I still don't have to like it. As far as the whole traveling thing goes, I have an idea."_

_"Sammy if this is about you traveling with me we've talked about this. Starting out I have to be focused and traveling is going to be crazy. This is a great opportunity not only for me, but for us."_

_"I know we talked about that and once I thought about it I realized it wasn't the best idea. I talked to my dad and he isn't thrilled about the idea, but he's willing to help."_

_"Help with what?" Phil raised his eyebrow at the secrecy._

_"I want to go to wrestling school."_

_"Are you serious right now?"_

_"Yeah, I thought about it and that's what's best for us. I'm going to train to be a diva. I've already been accepted into the WWE diva search competition."_

_"Samantha this is not a good idea, but I'm not going to put you down because I know that'll make everything worse. Just so you know even if it's diva training it's no cake walk, you're going to get your ass kicked!" Sam shrugged her shoulders._

_"I'm up for a challenge." Phil shook his head and pulled her close kissing her forehead._

_The rest of the trip was uneventful and Sam said very little to her mother. While her dad was okay with her decision to become a diva, her mother was horrified at the idea. Sam didn't care, she knew it was what she wanted and it was the only way her and Phil would stay together._


	14. Chapter 14

**Yet another memory getting in Sam's way of moving on with Jason...This is the initial meeting of the parents chapter...R&R, I own only OCs**

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><p>The plane touched down in Seattle just before noon and Jason made his way to the luggage area to get their bags while Sam used the restroom. Looking at her reflection, she fixed her hair and reapplied her lip gloss. Already this trip was a thorn in her side with her thinking about Phil, but she knew she had to go through with this and surely it would get better.<p>

Jason met her at Starbucks with their bags and they headed through the crowd to find her dad, Frank, who was picking them up. When she saw her dad through the crowd she smiled and rushed over to him greeting him with a big hug. It had been almost two years since she'd been home. Her WWE travel schedule had kept her busy and her new teaching job didn't leave much time or money for traveling. Jason interrupted the moment between them when he caught up to Sam.

"Oh dad, this is Jason and Jason this is my dad Frank Ryan."

"It's nice to meet you Mr. Ryan." Jason extended his hand, which my dad took into a firm handshake.

"Please call me Frank. It's nice to meet you." Frank turned back to his daughter a smile planted on his face. "So how's my Sammy Girl doing?"

"Dad please spare me the nickname! I'm almost 28 years old, it's not okay."

"I'm sorry Samantha, how are things?" Frank took Sam's Louis Vuitton luggage from Jason and began walking to the car.

"Everything is going well. My class is a great group and the principal loves me. Despite feeling rusty at first, I'm okay now." Frank popped the trunk on his Kia and loaded the luggage before climbing in the drivers seat. Sam and Jason followed suit and the car started towards her childhood home.

"That's great to hear. How's Phil doing?" Silence fell throughout the car. Why was her dad asking about her ex? Her face blushed and she knew she had to say something.

"As far as I know he's okay, I haven't talked to him in a while though."

"Right, I was just curious. I've been watching on Monday nights trying to keep tabs on his career. He's come a long way and he's very deserving of everything that has come his way." The rest of the thirty minute drive was silent and Sam couldn't wait to see her mom and get over the awkwardness that this trip had started with.

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><p>Frank pulled into the driveway and Sam's mom, Paula, was waiting on the front porch to greet her. When Paula found out about Sam leaving Phil their relationship started to mend itself. Paula found it unfortunate that the relationship didn't work out, but she was happy to see her daughter move on.<p>

"Hi mom, I've missed you." Sam hugged her mom before pulling back and introducing her to Jason. "Mom this is Jason who I've been telling you about. Jason this is my mother Paula." Paula held out her hand and Jason pressed a polite kiss to the back of her hand. This was something Phil had never done. Sam grabbed her bag from her dad and carried it up the stairs to her old room, which she found looked exactly the way she left it over 10 years ago. Surprisingly her mother came in behind her with Jason following.

"Jason you'll sleep in here with Samantha." Sam looked at her mother not sure if she had heard her correctly.

"Wait you're allowing us to share a room when we aren't married? Since when is that okay with you?" Phil always stayed in Matt's room on his futon and the two would sneak back and forth between the two rooms.

"Darling I'm aware that it's the year 2012 and I'm sure you two are having out of wedlock relations, so why try to pretend you aren't!" Sam's face was a bright shade of red and Jason tried to hide the smirk that appeared on his face.

"I'm going to pretend I never heard you say any of that. If you'll excuse us we're going to get settled in."

"Yes dear go ahead and do that. Dinner will be ready in a bit." Paula walked out of the room leaving Sam and Jason alone. He cleared his throat and met her eyes.

"Are you okay with us staying together?"

"Yeah it's not a big deal, we did it last night! I apologize for my dad bringing up my ex and my mom being herself, they never got the whole think before you speak thing!"

"I understand completely and it's not a big deal." Sam sat on her bed and Jason joined her taking her hand in his. "I really like you Sam and I'm willing to give you time to get over him, but I can't wait forever."

"What do you mean?"

"I can tell you're still hung up on your ex and it's understandable you guys were together for a long time. However I've been with you for almost four months and you're not showing any feelings towards me." Sam sat still staring into his blue eyes wishing deep down that there was a set of hazel ones looking back at her, but she knew what she had to do. She smiled at him and leaned forward kissing him passionately for the first time. When she pulled back she noticed her heart wasn't racing and she wasn't trembling even though she wanted to be.

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><p><strong>This story will be wrapping up within the next two weeks, but keep an eye out for a new one that I'm hoping to post early next week...the last 2 weeks of Raw have gotten my creative wheels turning, so be on the look out for a new post! :)<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

**Already things aren't going as Samantha expected they would...I own OCs only...Keep reading and reviewing :) Enjoy!**

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><p>The next morning Sam woke up and smiled feeling the arms of a strong man wrapped around her. She opened her eyes and glanced down expecting those arms to be covered in tattoos, but then she remembered she was with Jason. She let out a small sigh of disappointment and slipped out of his grip making her way to the bathroom. She splashed cold water on her face and brushed her teeth before returning to her room<br>and throwing on her sweats deciding to go for a run. Lacing up her sneakers, she grabbed her iPod and a bottle of water before heading out the door.

Sam ran for two miles trying desperately to clear her head. She didn't know what to do with herself. No matter how hard she tried to feel something for Jason, those feelings fell flat and she was reminded of Phil again. When she got back to the house her dad was sitting on the front porch reading the newspaper.

"Hey sweetheart, did you enjoy your run?" Sam took a seat beside her father taking a drink from her water bottle.

"Yeah, it was okay. It's always nice to run the old paths, but it didn't clear my head like I was hoping." Sam stared out into the distance. Frank put down the newspaper and turned his full attention to his only daughter.

"Care to take a walk."

"Dad I've already been gone for a while, Jason is probably wondering where I am and I'm starving."

"You can take 15 minutes to take a stroll with your old man." Sam rolled her eyes and followed her dad off the porch towards the woods behind the house. The two walked in silence for almost five minutes before her dad stopped and turned to face her.

"What really happened between you and Phil?" The question caught Sam off guard and she wasn't sure how to respond.

"We just fell apart, things weren't working out anymore."

"Samantha I'm very disappointed that you're lying to me right now. Right before you called to tell us about you two separating, Phil was here. He flew out here to Seattle and asked me for my permission and I granted it. I don't understand how in the matter of days things changed so much." Sam felt tears streaming from her eyes. She never knew that Phil had intentions of proposing and it made her feel even more guilty about ending their relationship the way she did.

"Dad something happened, something I'm not proud of. I had been feeling neglected and in an effort to feel needed I got really drunk one night and wound up sleeping with a co-worker. I tried to forget about it, but the guilt ate away at me. I left Phil, the break-up wasn't mutual. I made the decision to leave based on my own guilt and selfish needs. By the time he came home I was gone and my number was changed." Frank ran a hand through his graying hair finding it hard to hear what his daughter had just said.

"Have you told him about all this."

"Yes, just last week actually and it didn't go well. I don't think he'll ever speak to me again."

"That's where you're wrong. Despite the fact that you did this to him he loves you more then anything and I can tell you're still in love with him. Jason is a nice boy and honestly he's what your mother and I wanted for you, but he's not the one. The way you look at him I can tell you don't feel the way you should. You need to stop stringing the boy along and let him find his own special someone out there." Sam wiped at the tears on her face and let out a deep breath.

"You're right. When I'm with Jason I'm thinking of Phil. I don't know how I'm going to make things right between Phil and I, I honestly don't think he'll ever forgive me for what I did."

"You'll never know until you try. It won't be easy for him, but if he still loves you the way he told me he did then he'll find it in his heart to forgive you and move on from this." Frank pulled his daughter in for a hug kissing the top of her head. Sam could always count on her dad to tell her the truth and she was happy that he finally got her to admit how she truly felt. Now she just had to break the news to Jason and find a way to get Phil back.

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><p>When Sam got back to the house she avoided everyone in her path and headed straight for the shower. She turned the knob and sat on the side of the tub until the room filled with steam. When she finally climbed in she used the time to think about what she was going to do. As much as she wanted to spend the holiday with her family she needed to tell Jason what she was feeling now and head back to Chicago to talk to Phil. When she finished she wiped the steam from the mirror and stared at herself for a minute. She looked like hell to say the least and seeing what she had been through in the past few months it was understandable. She ran a comb through her long brown hair and thought to herself. For the first time in a long time she was making decisions based on just her thoughts and not including the input of Corey or Mattie, which she hadn't done in over a year.<p>

Sam put on some make-up and grabbed her blue jeans and a gray and black striped sweater, slipping her black moccasins on. She braided her hair letting it hang over her right shoulder and took a deep breath. She needed to come clean to Jason and there was no better time like the present.


	16. Chapter 16

**She knows what she has to do...now how is she going to do it? I own OCs only, R&R, Enjoy :)**

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><p>Sam and Jason walked back the same path through the woods that she had walked with her dad earlier that day. The two came across a log and Sam took a seat motioning for Jason to join her. They were both quiet for a few minutes, which made for an awkward situation and then Sam took a deep breath forcing her words out of her mouth.<p>

"Jason you're a terrific guy and I enjoy spending time with you, but..."

"But I'm not what you want. I figured this was coming even though I hoped it wouldn't."

"I'm so sorry, I really have tried to feel something for you, but it's just not working. I'm still in love with someone else and I don't think it's fair for you to miss out on the one because you're with me and I'm hung up on someone else."

"I understand Sam. I hoped things would've turned out differently, but what can you do, the heart wants what the heart wants." Sam smiled at Jason and he returned the sentiment.

"Can we still be friends?"

"I'd like that a lot. Samantha you're a beautiful person inside and out and you're ex is an idiot if he doesn't see that." Sam nodded hoping that Jason was right and Phil would remember how Sam used to be before she screwed everything up based on her own selfish needs.

"I'm flying home to Chicago later tonight despite my mothers objections. If you'd like I can book you a ticket."

"That's nice of you, but I think I'm going to enjoy a little down time here in Seattle. Good luck Sam, you have my number if you need me." Jason kissed Sam on the cheek before he got up from the log and headed back towards the house. Sam stayed behind feeling relieved that her talk with Jason had gone well, now she just had to prepare herself for the most important conversation she would ever have.

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><p>Sam arrived at the airport to wait for her 7PM flight at 5:30. She didn't have to sit there long before she found out it had been delayed. Sam let out a sigh as she fidgeted in her seat. All she wanted was to get home and talk to him, but mother nature was working her way through the east coast and she was ruining Sam's plan by dumping snow throughout the city. It would figure that the winter season would be mild until Samantha needed to get home, then mother nature would release her fury. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and called Corey hoping that he would answer despite them not talking for over a week.<p>

"Hey Sam how's Seattle? Do the other Ryan's love Jason?"

"About that...long story short I'm trying to get back to Chicago, but my flight is delayed. The other Ryan's loved Jason, but I do not, so I broke it off."

"You did what?"

"It's okay, it was mutual. He could tell I wasn't feeling anything special for him, we're friends though. How's the weather?"

"What?"

"I need to know how the weather is! My flight has been pushed back two hours as it is and I need to get home like yesterday!"

"Sam you're insane! I wouldn't be surprised if your flight is grounded. It's been coming down heavy here all day, it's not supposed to let up until Christmas."

"Christmas is two days away, I don't have two days. Fuck it, I'm taking matters in to my own hands." Sam hung up the phone and ran over to the rent a car station. Twenty minutes later she got the keys to a Jeep Cherokee and tossed her luggage in the back before turning over the ignition and heading towards Chicago.

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><p><strong>Looking forward to Raw tonight :)<strong>


	17. Chapter 17

**Obviously she's a woman on a mission choosing to drive from Seattle to Chicago...Another flashback this chapter...Thanks for the follows and reviews...I own OCs only, Read & Review, Enjoy :)**

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><p>Four hours into her trip she realized how irrational she had been by ditching her flight and getting a rental car. Driving was going to take over a day, at this rate she should have just went back home, enjoyed the holidays and took the first flight to Chicago she could get. It was too late to turn back now as she kept driving, the music from her iPod coming through the speakers. The upside of driving she had more then enough time to think about what she was going to say.<p>

Just outside the Montana border Sam stopped at a diner to get a quick bite and load up on coffee. The long trip was beginning to wear on her, but she knew she needed to keep pushing on. Regardless how everything turned out she could add this adventure to her list of crazy things she had done. It had been a while since she did something without thinking it through and she wished she could be spontaneous more often. The last time she did something without thinking was over a year ago and of course she'd done it with Phil. He was always trying to get her to be more spontaneous and not worry about things so much. As she sipped her coffee waiting for her BLT she thought about that weekend. It was long before the cheating and lying, they were so in love and nothing seemed like it was going to end that.

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><p><em>Phil and Sam were lying on the bed in their hotel watching bad horror movies with nothing to do. They weren't set to travel until Sunday, but they didn't feel like traveling home to Chicago for the short weekend. The original plan was to be lazy, but that never seemed to work for either of them. Sam let out a yawn as she picked at the ends of her hair. Phil could tell she was bored and as much as he loved bad horror movies he was feeling the same way. He clicked off the TV and turned on his side propping himself up with his left hand.<em>

_"Let's go somewhere."_

_"Okay, where should we go?"_

_"I don't know. I think we should pack up, check out and just drive, see where we end up." Sam raised her eyebrows at him._

_"You and your crazy ideas. We can't just go somewhere and not have a plan."_

_"Come on! Sammy why do you always have to have a plan! You trust me right?"_

_"Of course I trust you, but what does that have to do with anything."_

_"Pack your luggage and pick a direction, we're leaving in 20 minutes." Phil got up from the bed grabbing clothes and heading towards the shower. Sam sat up and looked at him her mouth hanging open._

_"You're insane, I'm not going anywhere."_

_"Yes you are and now you're down to 19 minutes. I suggest you quit wasting time!" Phil shut the bathroom door and Sam heard the sound of the shower. She briefly complained under her breath before she started shoving her clothes and shoes into her Louis Vuitton luggage shaking her head that she was going along with this._

_Exactly 18 minutes later they were checked out of the hotel and sitting comfortably in the black rented Mustang that Phil insisted on getting from time to time. He looked at Sam with his baseball cap on and wearing that smirk that always made Sam forget her worries._

_"Where to?"_

_"I don't know! This was your crazy plan, you pick."_

_"Woman I told you to pick a direction, now make a decision." Sam rolled her eyes and pushed her hair out of her face._

_"Fine, south it is."_

_"You sure? I heard there's more to do north of here." Sam shoved Phil's shoulder and he laughed. Starting the car he started south without any plan of where they were going._

_Two hours later it was starting to get dark and Sam could tell they were in the middle of nowhere. While she was starting to panic, Phil didn't have a care in the world. He was too wrapped up in driving fast and listening to music. Sam let out a long sigh, which he took notice of as he put his hand over hers._

_"Sammy will you relax! This isn't the first time I've done this, we're fine." Sam felt a little more relaxed, but she still wasn't completely okay. They drove another 20 miles before Phil pulled off at a diner cutting the engine._

_"This place looks like something out of a horror movie."_

_"I know, isn't it great!" Sam looked at him and he could tell she was not amused! "Sammy we're in North Carolina, Leatherface is in Texas, we'll live. Actually I won't unless I eat something now, so let's go!" Sam let out a deep breath before getting out of the car and taking Phil's hand. They sat in a corner booth and Phil sat beside Sam like he always did. The place was a little homier on the inside then it was on the outside and the food was actually decent. Before they left Phil asked about what there was to do in the area and the woman went on for almost 10 minutes. When they got back to the car Phil didn't say anything, he just put the car in reverse and got back on the highway._

_"Now what's the plan?"_

_"Why must there always be a plan with you? For the next 48 hours I want you to let go of everything and just trust me. I'm going to make sure you have the best weekend of your life Sammy Ryan and if you don't then you can pretend that it was awesome. Either way I promise you a memorable adventure!" Sam shook her head and looked out the window at the scenery passing by._

_The next thing Sam knew the car had come to a stop and she woke up rubbing the sleep from her eyes._

_"I love you, but you are a horrible co-pilot!" Phil smiled at her and she looked around not knowing where they were._

_"Where are we?"_

_"Somewhere in North Carolina. I figured we'll check into this cozy bed and breakfast and go from there. You can pick what we do tonight because I have big plans for tomorrow." Sam yawned thinking how nice it would be to just curl up and go to sleep. "Samantha it's 8PM, we're not going to bed, so I suggest you wake yourself up!" Sam glared in Phil's direction as she grabbed her luggage and followed behind him._

_They checked into the bed and breakfast, which was very sweet and old fashioned. Sam propped her luggage by the door and laid on the bed. Her idea of sleeping was interrupted when Phil began poking and tickling her until she finally sat up._

_"Why can't I go to sleep? You said I get to pick what we do and I'd like to sleep!"_

_"Sammy this is an adventure trip, you don't go to bed before midnight on an adventure trip. So, what are we doing?"_

_"I don't know! I don't even know where we are, so I don't know what there is to do."_

_"You really suck at this! Go change your outfit and be ready in a half hour." Sam opened her mouth to protest, but she knew she wouldn't win, so she stomped over to her luggage and grabbed one of her summer dresses before stomping into the bathroom to shower. She emerged exactly 30 minutes later wearing a white halter sundress that hugged close to her body. Her sun kissed skin added a natural glow to her and her hair was pushed to one side in loose curls. She slipped on a pair of thong flip flops and grabbed her black clutch. Phil looked at Sam who was waiting impatiently with her arms crossed by the door and raised an eyebrow. He didn't get to see her dressed like this a lot, so when he did, he took the time to take it in and cherish the moment. After a minute of staring he walked over to her and kissed her._

_"You look beautiful, so beautiful that your plan of staying in sounds fantastic."_

_"I don't think so! I'm dressed to go out, so let's go!" Phil smirked as she walked towards the door and he followed close behind. She headed towards the car, but he took her hand and pulled her in a different direction. Sam wasn't sure where they were headed, but she promised to trust Phil._

_After walking for a few minutes Sam noticed the sound of the ocean and sure enough the sidewalk turned into sand._

_"You knew we were near the beach the whole time didn't you?" Phil laughed and pulled Sam close to him putting his arm around her shoulder._

_"I told you I knew where I was going and you didn't have to panic." Phil sat down in the sand and Sam sat in front of him leaning into his chest. The couple sat in silence just listening to the ocean roll in and out, the moon lighting up the night sky. Sam let out a sigh breaking the silence._

_"I don't think I'll ever love anyone like I love you." Phil noticed what she said and felt himself panic a little._

_"What do you mean by that? You're not planning on leaving me are you?"_

_"No way, you're so good to me with your romantic gestures. We've been together for a long time and I don't think that I'd be me without you."_

_"I'm sure you'd still be you, maybe not as bitchy, but you wouldn't change a bit. I love you Sam and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. My contract is up soon and I don't want to resign. What do you say we get married, settle down and start a family?" Sam was quiet for a few minutes as she let what he said sink in. Finally she turned to face him, the moon providing just enough light on his face._

_"Are you sure that's what you want? Wrestling has been everything to you for so many years. Are you really ready to give that up and settle down?"_

_"Wrestling hasn't been everything to me, you are everything to me. I'm ready to move on to the next part of my life and I want you to be there." Sam felt a tear fall down her cheek and Phil reached up to wipe it away. Wrapping her arms around his neck she kissed him softly._

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><p>That night was forever in Sam's memory and even when she tried to move on her words to him had become reality. She wasn't able to love anyone the way she had loved him.<p> 


	18. Chapter 18

**Sam finally makes it home this chapter after an agonizing drive, but what happens next? As always thanks for the follows and reviews, they keep the creative process going :) I own OCs only, Read & Review! As always, enjoy :)**

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><p>After driving for almost 35 hours and drinking nothing but coffee and Red Bull, Sam saw the lights of Chicago. Her mind begged her to go home and sleep, but her heart was pulling her in a different direction.<p>

She parked in front of Phil's apartment and sat in the car catching her breath. It took every ounce of courage she had to leave the safe confines of the car and walk up those familiar stairs to his place. She stood outside his door feeling frozen in place, but she finally brought her hand up to knock on the door. The time it took for the door to be answered felt like an eternity, but when it opened Sam felt her stomach drop. Standing in the doorway was Beth, one of the divas she had worked with, someone who was once considered her friend.

"Hey Sam, I wasn't expecting you to show up especially at this hour." It took everything Sam had to keep a smile on her face when she was dying inside, her heart crumbling like a cookie.

"I'm sorry to come by so late, I just wanted to see what Phil was up to. I'll just come by some other time." Sam quickly turned to leave, running down the stairs with tears blinding her eyesight. She was too late, he had moved on, which he had every right to do. When she got outside, she took a minute to pull herself together sitting on the apartment steps. Laughing to herself she realized this was the worst possible way to spend Christmas. Why hadn't she stayed in Seattle? There she would be among family, gathered around the fire place. Instead she was here, sitting outside in the freezing cold and snow with a sweater on, no one to go home to. She put her head between her knees to get a few deep breaths and was surprised to hear her name.

"Sam? What are you doing here?" She looked up to see Phil standing before her. Wiping at her eyes she thought of something to say.

"Well it's a long story with a difficult ending." Phil sat beside her on the landing.

"What are you talking about and why are you running around in freezing weather in a thin sweater? Also, don't take this the wrong way, but you look like hell." Sam couldn't help but let out a laugh knowing that she had looked better.

"I haven't slept for a while. I just spent the last day driving from Seattle to Chicago because I'm stupid and thought that just maybe...forget what I thought, I was obviously wrong."

"You're not making any sense at all. Why would you leave your family before Christmas?"

"Because I thought there was someone here who I needed to get to, but I realized a few minutes ago that's not the case. I'm going to head home and spend Christmas alone." Sam got up from the steps and walked over to the car.

"Why are you spending it alone? What about Mattie and Corey, or that new boyfriend of yours?" Sam stood with her hand on the door handle, more tears were in her eyes when she turned to face him.

"I don't have a boyfriend anymore. I couldn't bring myself to feel anything for him because I'm still feeling those things for someone else. I made the biggest mistake of my life doing what I did to you and then leaving the way I did, but no matter how hard I try to stop I can't." Phil got up from the steps and walked closer to Sam still maintaining some distance.

"What are you saying Sammy?"

"I'm saying that I'm in love with you, I never stopped loving you and I don't know that I ever will stop. It doesn't matter though because I see that you moved on, so I guess I'll have to find a way to do the same."

"What the hell do you mean I moved on?"

"I went upstairs when I got here and Beth answered the door, I put two and two together."

"Well you shouldn't jump to conclusions. Beth couldn't get a flight out to Buffalo until tomorrow because of the storm, so I let her crash on my couch. Samantha I haven't moved on even though I've tried to, especially after last week when you told me why you left."

"I'll never be able to tell you how sorry I am for what I did, I hate myself for it. I would also understand if you weren't able to forgive me, I don't deserve it, but I had to tell you how I feel because keeping it in is killing me." Phil stood for a minute staring at the ground. When he finally looked at her Sam could see the light in his eyes.

"Listen I need time to think things over. I can't just kiss and make-up, you did a lot of damage when you left and for the first time I don't know if I should trust you. I'm home until Sunday and then I travel through the week, but I'll be home New Years Eve and I'll give you an answer then." Phil turned away from her and headed inside of his apartment leaving Sam alone in the cold. She got inside the rented Jeep and wiped the tears from her eyes before heading home.

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><p><strong>Only two chapters left...Phil doesn't have a lot of time to make up his mind...<strong>


	19. Chapter 19

**This story is starting to come to a close, but don't worry I've got more stuff in the works! Last time we heard from Sam she was left broken hearted when Phil told her he needed time...this chapter we'll see how she's doing...it's also New Years Eve, has he made his decision?**

**I own nothing except OCs and original ideas...continue to add me, add this story and review :)**

**R&R...Enjoy :)**

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><p>Sam spent Christmas day alone in her apartment catching up on the sleep she desperately needed. The rest of the week went the same way with Sam only leaving her bed to get food from the kitchen and to take the occasional shower. She lived off of junk food and watched her Sex and the City collection over and over. She hadn't heard from Phil or spoken to anyone else. As if she didn't feel like a fool already, the last thing she wanted was to be criticized by her friends and family. She was content with being miserable and alone and couldn't help but think maybe she should get used to feeling that way.<p>

Corey and Mattie hadn't heard from Sam since before Christmas. The pair was unsure of how things had gone down with Phil, but decided Sam needed an intervention and a night out. Letting themselves into Sam's apartment they realized that things were worse then they expected. Sam was far from OCD, but she took pride in her apartment and always kept it clean. Mattie cringed when she saw dishes piled in the sink and empty pints of Ben & Jerry's on the counter.

"I think this is worse then we thought!" Mattie looked toward Corey who had a shocked expression on his face.

"Yeah, I hear Sex and the City playing, she's reliving Carrie and Big's relationship, that's never a good thing." Mattie and Corey made their way back the hall and slowly opened the bedroom door where they found Sam asleep, laying among M&Ms and mini candy bar wrappers. Corey grabbed the trash can from the foot of her bed and started to clean up. Mattie went into the bathroom turning on the shower and came back working on getting Sam awake. It took a few minutes, but when Sam's eyes fluttered open she was surprised she wasn't alone.

"What are you guys doing here?" Sam asked with sleep heavy in her voice.

"Honey neither of us have heard from you, we were worried." Mattie helped Sam sit up realizing that her friend looked worse now then she ever had.

"Well thanks for the concern, but I'm okay. What day is it?"

"You're not okay! You've been indulging in Sex and the City and junk food, that's not good. Hell you don't even know what day it is!"

"I'm fine, stop treating me like a child! Things have been rough lately, you guys act like I've been cooped up in here for a week."

"Samantha today is New Years Eve, you have been cooped up in here for a week." Sam jumped up when Mattie told her what today was. Grabbing her phone she turned it on and looked for any message or text that might be from Phil. Unfortunately everything was from her parents, Corey and Mattie. Letting out a sigh she plopped back down onto the bed.

"He's supposed to decide today even though something tells me I already know the answer." Corey put down the trash can and sat on the other side of Sam.

"So you did talk to him?"

"Yes, I drove for 35 hours hopped up on coffee and Red Bull only to get to him and have him tell me that he needed time to think. It's understandable and I want to respect that, but at the same time I hate that I've given him a reason to doubt us at all." Corey let out a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. He looked over at Mattie and the two nodded in agreement, deciding to set their plan in motion.

"Sam we're not going to let you ring in the new year alone, so go get a shower, Mattie will get you all dolled up and we're going out."

"Corey that's sweet, but I'm not in the mood. Besides what if he tries to call me or if he comes here and I'm not home."

"Well we're not going to let you sit here and wait for a guy to make his decision. If he wants you bad enough he'll find you. Besides the way you look right now, you're less then attractive!" Mattie shot a look in Corey's direction causing him to shrug. Sam looked between her two friends.

"So you're telling me that even if I have no interest in going out I really don't have a say?"

"Yes that's exactly it! Now the shower is nice and steamed, go jump in. Take your time though, we've got plenty of it." Sam reluctantly got up from her bed and made her way towards the shower. While she was in there she tried to think positive thoughts, but she had a nagging feeling that things weren't going to turn out well.

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><p>Sam got out of the shower and wiped the steam from the mirror taking a long look at her reflection. The shower had helped her look a little better, but the bags under her eyes were still there. She dabbed some concealer on hiding them a little bit and then continued with the rest of her makeup. She blow dried her hair leaving it in her naturally curly state, something she almost never did. By the time she exited the bathroom she looked much better then she had when she entered, even though she wasn't 100%.<p>

Mattie and Corey were surprised to see their friend had styled her hair and done her own makeup and was now headed for her closet. Sam didn't even think twice about what she wanted to wear digging into the back of her closet and pulling out the purple top that Phil had bought her. She looked at it and managed to smile a little even though she still felt an ache in her heart.

Fifteen minutes later Sam was dressed in the purple top, dark wash skinny jeans, her black knee high stiletto boots and a black scarf to tie everything together. Her two friends looked on astonished at the different person standing before them. They could still tell she wasn't thrilled to be going out, but it was nice that she was at least trying.

"Okay, well I guess we should get going then." Corey walked out of the bedroom with Sam and Mattie following behind. After putting on their jackets, all three of them headed out the door. Sam tried her best to hold a smile in place, but it wasn't as easy as she thought it would be.

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><p>The three friends grabbed dinner at Pelago. Sam was surprised that she ate all of her chicken parmesan, but it donned on her she had been living off of ice cream and candy for the last week, so real food tasted better then usual. Throughout dinner Sam checked her phone making sure that she wouldn't miss anything in case Phil sent something, but after an hour of constant checking there was still nothing. Feeling frustrated, she put her phone on vibrate and slipped it inside her coat pocket.<p>

After dinner, Corey and Mattie decided it was time to hit the club. Sam wasn't looking forward to this at all. She wasn't a club goer to begin with and the way she had been feeling she thought about opting out, but realized there was nothing else for her to do. When the trio arrived at The Underground club, Sam noticed Jason waiting in line and Corey went right over to him. This was not what Sam wanted to deal with tonight or any night. Granted her and Jason had decided to remain friends, but Sam had a suspicion that Corey was up to something else. Sam grabbed Corey by the arm and pulled him out of Jason's ear shot.

"Corey what the hell is this?"

"What is what? Jason? It's a coincidence."

"Really? You forget that I've been your best friend for 20 years and I know when you're lying to me. Tell me the truth, what is this about?"

"I thought he might help cheer you up. He really likes you, why can't you just give him a chance?"

"I did give him a chance! I dated him for over three months and I'm sorry if he feels something, but I can't reciprocate those feelings. I'm in love with someone else."

"Yeah Sam you're in love with someone else and where is that getting you? Where is he?" Sam glared at Corey, tears welling up in her eyes. Phil might not be ready to make a decision, but Sam knew what she had to do.

"I don't know where he is Corey, but I'm going to find him. Maybe one of these days you'll stop being such a jerk, when that happens call me." Sam waved goodbye to Mattie and Jason before hailing a cab.


	20. Chapter 20

**Well here it is, the last chapter...I'm kind of sad to see it end, but don't worry I have more things in the works. Thanks so much for taking an interest in this story and following both the story and me as the author...also thanks for the reviews! I hope you like how it ends...**

**I own nothing except OCs and original ideas...**

**R&R...Enjoy :)**

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><p>Sam was in the cab for 10 minutes until they encountered a traffic jam outside of downtown. She let out a sigh looking at her watch and realized it was 11:15. Everyone was trying to get to the party or club of the night to ring in the new year and it was screwing up her plans. Chewing on her lip she thought for a minute. Sam had two choices, sit here and wait for the cab to move. If she did that who knows when she'd get to her destination. The second choice was her paying the cabbie and walking the rest of the way. She wasted 10 minutes debating, only taking that long because her feet were already killing her and she had close to two miles to walk. Finally she decided to pay the cabbie and start walking thinking she could work off some of that junk food she'd spent the week eating.<p>

She strolled down the sidewalks of Chicago trying to keep her mind off of her aching feet. At 11:40 she felt her phone vibrate and pulled it out of her pocket stopping in mid stride to read and reread the text on the screen. She let out a deep breath seeing the words "We need to talk" with Phil's number on the ID. Her hands shook slightly as she texted him back that she would was 10 minutes from his place. Putting her phone back in her pocket she realized she was a good 20 minutes away and if she was going to make it on time she'd have to run. Letting out a sigh she took off her stiletto boots holding them in her hand and began to run in her nylon socks. She hated the idea of practically running barefoot, but running in stilettos wasn't an option.

Eight minutes later she slowed her pace and attempted to catch her breath while fumbling to put her boots back on. She was pretty sure that right now she looked like a hot mess after running close to two miles, but she knew she had to go in because he was waiting. Walking up the stairs to his apartment she fought to steady her breath as she thought about how her life could change in the next few minutes.

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><p>Standing outside Phil's apartment reminded Sam of what had greeted her a week before. She hoped that Beth wasn't here and she kind of figured she wasn't or Phil wouldn't have had her over to talk. Butterflies danced in her stomach as she knocked on the door and waited for him to answer. The door opened and she was taken back by how good he looked. His hair was pushed out of his face and his beard was fuller then he usually let it get. She tried not to smile seeing she didn't know the outcome of this talk as he moved allowing her to pass by him. Removing her coat and scarf she stood for a moment feeling awkward. Neither of them said anything or moved from the spot they were standing in. Sam stared at her hands that were shaking slightly as she twirled the ring on her right hand waiting for something to break the silence. Finally Phil let out a sigh and opened his mouth to speak.<p>

"So I've done a lot of thinking this week and there's some things I'm sure of and a few things I'm not sure of." Sam wasn't sure what he could be thinking, but she braced herself waiting to hear the worst.

"Okay, well I'm ready to hear it."

"Sammy you once told me you thought you could never love anyone the way you loved me. Is that still true?"

"Yes it is. I dated a lawyer that my friends and family thought the world of, but I felt nothing. After three months with him I didn't feel love for him, I was comfortable with him, but I realized he wasn't you. I've only ever loved you." Phil avoided eye contact with Sam as he slid his hand through his hair. Sam had spoken from her heart, but she still couldn't read his expression.

"The incident with Matt, how can I be sure you won't do that again?" His eyes met hers this time and they were full of hurt. Sam took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of her nose holding the tears in.

"Phil, Matt and I both made a huge mistake. I hurt you and he hurt Eve and I hate that I stooped to that level. I should have talked to you about how I was feeling rather then turning to drinking or another person. I know I hurt you worse then anyone ever has and you'll always have a problem trusting me, but I hope you believe me when I tell you nothing like that will ever happen again. I want you, no one else will ever come close to you." He nodded still not showing an expression on his face.

"One more thing, do you realize now how much I love you?" Sam wiped at the tear falling down her cheek and nodded. She still didn't know how to take any of this. He could be asking these questions to see if she was still loyal to him, or it could be him setting her up for failure.

"My dad told me about your trip out there and the ring, which made me feel like a bigger heartless bitch. I hate that I didn't talk to you, that I cheated and that I left the way did. I was an idiot and if I could go back and change everything I would, but I can't. I'm ready to live with the consequences if I have to, but I really hope that you can some how forgive me." Sam looked at the floor not wanting to see what Phil's eyes were saying.

"I've thought about us a lot this week and call me crazy, but I forgive you, for everything. Sammy I still love you, it hurts not to. My life isn't the same unless you're in it, so I'm hoping you'll give us another shot." Sam couldn't believe what she had just heard. He was forgiving her for everything she had done even though she didn't think he ever would. Phil walked over to her, wiped her tears and took Sam in his arms. She breathed him in smelling the scent she had missed for over a year. Sam pulled back from him and looked in to his hazel eyes.

"When did you decide to do this, to give us another chance?"

"Deep down I knew a week ago when I saw you sitting outside my apartment and you told me you drove for 35 hours straight to talk to me. Do you have any idea how crazy and dangerous that is?"

"I'm aware, but I didn't think with my head, I followed my heart. Besides it was an adventure trip if nothing else."

"Well from now on you're only going on adventures like that if I'm with you. I love you Samantha Ryan, always have always will." Sam smiled a genuine smile for the first time in a week.

"I love you too Phil Brooks. Keep in mind you are stuck with me forever!" Phil smirked and Sam felt every worry and every care go away. She pulled him close to her and they kissed like they had never stopped.

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><p><strong>There you have it...I'll be posting my next story within the next few days...be on the look out for "One Night Changes Everything" inspired by Wade's injury, it follows him, my OCs Ginger, Liz and of course CM Punk because he always seems to be a go to! <strong>


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